When I Was Just a Kid...Tricia Goyer

When I Was Just a Kid...

Tricia Goyer

See this little cutie at age 2? She was writing even back then. Did you guess that this was Tricia Goyer a few days ago when I posted this photo? Two years later she still had the knack and books stacked around her.(See photo below to the right.) Let's find out about Tricia and what it was back then that developed her into the writer she is today:
Tricia's memories:
Childhood Ambition: School Teacher. From as long as I could remember, I wanted to teach 3rd grade.
[Crystal Editor's note: Tricia homeschools and teaches many about writing and mentors teen mothers, as well as talks on parenting issues. She definitely reached beyond this childhood ambition!]

Fondest Memory (then): One Christmas when I was 12 my parents bought me a red tape recorder. That afternoon, after we left my grandparents house my mom, step-dad, brother and I went home and made up stories that we taped. We made up funny voices and laughed and laughed. It was a simple thing, but a very fond memory. It was also one of the only times I remember my parents "playing" with us in an interactive way.

Proudest Moment (now or then): Watching my kids serve God, for sure: When my 14-year-old daughter used her own money to buy a Bible for her friend. When my 17-year-old son won the "Christian Character Award" for his basketball team last month. When I see my 12-year-old son reading his Bible.


Biggest Challenge as a child or teen: The biggest challenge for me was finding out I was pregnant as a 17-year-old teen. I was so embarassed that I dropped out of high school. I thought my life was over for sure. BUT it was through this challenge I gave my heart to Jesus. I asked Him, "To do something with my life." To God be the glory ... He's done more than I've asked or imagined!


My First Job: Babysitting. I think I made $1.50 an hour.

Childhood indulgence: Reading. Summers were spent at the library.

Favorite Outfit as a child: In 5th grade I got this really cool green satin jacket. I lost it at school a few weeks later. I was VERY sad.

Favorite Childhood Movie: The Parent Trap. Since I didn't know my biological father I always wondered if I had a sister out there. (I grew up with one brother.) Amazingly, last year I met three sisters!!! I have one more sister I haven't met yet. They are more amazing, wonderful, and similar to me than I ever imagined.

Favorite Childhood Book: Little House on the Prairie (by Laura Ingalls Wilder)

Childhood hero: Helen Keller

Tricia had some rough places in her life, but God had plans for her. Big plans. Plans for a hope and a future. The author of five novels, two non-fiction books, and one children's book, Tricia was named Mount Hermon Christian Writers Conference "Writer of the Year" in 2003.Besides turning her interests and "rough places" into award-winning nonfiction and fiction, she is one busy wife and mom, and she gives back what God has granted to her by pouring her energies into these interests and causes. From mentoring teen moms, to mentoring writers on her new blog to helping Generation X with parenting, Tricia must never sleep!

Tricia lives in Montana with her husband and three kids where she homeschools, leads children's church, and mentors teenage mothers.

Books Tricia has written:

Historical Fiction: [WWII and Spanish Civil War]
(2003) From Dust and Ashes, (2004) Night Song ,(2005) Dawn of a Thousand Nights,

(2006) Arms of Deliverance,(2007) A Valley of Betrayal [Her latest novel,released in February],(2007) A Shadow of Treason [released in the Fall]

(2007) My Life, Unscripted

(2006) Generation NeXt Parenting
In 2005, her book Life Interrupted was a finalist for the Gold Medallion. Also in 2005, her novel Night Song won AmericanChristianFictionWriter's Book of the Year for Long Historical Romance. In 2006, her novel Dawn of a Thousand Nights also won Book of the Year for Long Historical. She's written over 250 articles for national publications and hundreds of Bible Study notes for the Women of Faith Study Bible.
(2004) Life Interrupted
(2004) 10 Minutes to Showtime
(2000) Mealtime Moments

Tricia has three books that will be out soon
...My Life Unscripted (Thomas Nelson, Children's Division),
Summer 2007
A Shadow of Treason (Moody Publishing) Fall 2007
Generation NeXt Marriage (Multnomah), January 2008




Ok, admit it. Sometimes life is really tough. If you ever start complaining that life didn't hand you a bouquet of roses, take a hard look at Tricia's story. Read some of her books. Tricia's theme in all of it is that God is bigger than anything. He has a plan. If anyone embodies and proclaims Jeremiah 29:11 in their life, that person is Tricia Goyer.

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."

Check out Tricia's blogs and web sites:

http://www.triciagoyer.com
www.shoutlife.com/triciagoyer
www.triciagoyer.blogspot.com
www.genxparents.blogspot.com
www.writerquotes.blogspot.com

http://www.mywritingmentor.blogspot.com/

When I Was Just a Kid...Marti Kramer Suddarth

When I Was Just a Kid...

Marti Kramer Suddarth

Even as a baby Marti Suddarth was watching over children. Her whole life has centered around family and children. And because she is a fellow Hoosier, her stories seem incredibly familiar, even though I just met her a few years ago in my SALT (Struggling Artists of Literary Talent) group. Of all the memories I've collected so far, some of Marti's resonant with me. See if you don't find a familiar chord, as well. She is kind to everyone, even giving in to keep a stray dog who came to liven up their lives--Splash, The Wonder Dog, a dog of beagle persuasion.


Marti has a special talent for music and writing songs and skits to use with kids--and she is music CD reviewer, publishing reviews in various places. Her writing revolves around things to do with children. She's married to a music teacher(Daniel--22 years! and she looks like a kid still) and they have 3 children (Kate, Scott, and Abby) who all exhibit many talents that she has nurtured. Oh, and did I mention she's a teacher?


Meet Marti--whose byline is Marti Kramer Suddarth.



Childhood Ambition: When I was 3 or 4, I wanted to do the weather on TV! I saw people on TV, pointing to a map, and thought that would be fun. In grade school, I wanted to be a writer and I wanted to compose music for "Schoolhouse Rock." And now I AM a writer, and I'd still like to compose music for "Schoolhouse Rock" or something similar. And then for a while, I wanted to be a concert pianist.




Fondest Memory (then): Wow! I have so many good memories, it would be hard to pick ONE. I remember "camping out" in the living room with my brother and sisters. We'd drag our pillows and blankets into the living room and sleep there - all 5 of us. I remember stopping the Merrymobile to get ice-cream. My brother and I would each have a nickel and the Merrymobile would actually stop!My sister Emily and I used to stand in front of the mirror, singing into hairbrushes, pretending we had our own TV show like Donny & Marie! When I was in mid-to-late elementary school, my dad rode his bicycle to work, just a couple of miles from home. Every once in a while, I'd get to go out to breakfast with Dad. Mom would wake me up early, I'd get dressed, and then Dad and I would ride our bicycles to the Farmer's Daughter Restaurant for breakfast. We'd ride most of the way home together, until we had to part company. I'd go home and Dad would go to work. I'd usually get home about the time my brother and sisters were getting up to get ready for school. (Of course, they had their turns too.) I loved going out for breakfast with Dad!



Proudest Moment (now or then): I know it sounds corny, but I'm so proud of my children. What could I possibly do that would top having these three wonderful people calling me, "Mom?"



Biggest Challenge as a child or teen: I was such a geeky child. Really. I was short and skinny and covered in freckles and I had big, huge glasses. Of course, I was extremely UNathletic. I was the child who sat in the corner and read books almost as fast as I could turn the pages. So I suppose my biggest challenge is that I never felt like part of the crowd. I always felt like I was on the outside. And I guess that makes me pretty lucky, huh? Think how many people have worse problems .... health problems ... family problems ... and the worst thing I can say about my childhood was that I was a dork.




My First Job: I used to give piano lessons to several children in the neighborhood. I think I only made $2 a lesson, and I had to walk to their houses! Of course, to a seventh grader, that $2 seemed like a lot of money.




Childhood indulgence: The Merrymobile ... breakfast with Dad ... trips to the zoo with Dad. (He's such a big kid, I think he loved going as much as we did.)

Play time favorite that influenced your writing: Reading, of course. I loved reading, which lead me to want to be a writer. I loved "Schoolhouse Rock," and wanted (ok, still want) to work on projects like that. I used to listen to Keith Green's music (although that was in high school), which influenced the way I played the piano. That, in turn, influenced the way I compose, which influences the way I write.



Favorite Childhood Movie: I don't know! When I was in grade school we watched an old black and white movie called "Life with Father." (Elizabeth Taylor was a teenager, and one of the policemen from "Adam 12" was a little younger.) Some of the humor was so subtle (especially the part about the pug dog) that my brother and sisters and I loved that movie and still talk about it, even though I haven't seen it in years.

Crystal Editor's note: Marti knows more about old TV shows than anyone I know. She is a walking library. And she knows all sorts of details--in case you need an expert when you're writing. Ask her or daughter Katie about Star Trek.


Favorite Childhood Book: Laura Ingall's Wilder's "Little House" series. I read them over and over, and even now, as an adult, sometimes I feel a little nostalgic and go read them again.

Childhood hero: This'll be the third time I've mentioned this, but in the mid-1970's, I thought that the people who wrote "Schoolhouse Rock" had THE best jobs in the world!


Favorite Childhood Easter Memory: I don't know that there is a specific memory so much as remembering my Easter dresses. My mother is such an amazing seamstress ... and when I was really little, she made me dresses every year. I always thought mine were the best because everyone else had store bought dresses, but mine were made by Mom.


Crystal Editor's Note: Marti is famous in our SALT sisters group for telling stories about her family. They are really good stories. And she could not resist telling us a story about children in her life as an adult. So, because Marti is a good storyteller, I am indulging this here! (Hey, I'm the boss of this blog...)



The Kramer Sisters (brother Bill is in the baby photo above.) Marti is to the left.

And if I'm allowed into adulthood :-): Several years ago, all 5 Kramer children and their spouses and children met at Mom & Dad's for Easter weekend. Mom asked sister Nancy and Kate & Scott to color the eggs on Saturday ... pointed them out in the fridge and then left them to do the coloring. They colored ALL of the eggs in the fridge, instead of just the hard boiled ones. So the next day, not knowing which eggs were which, Mom hid all of the eggs and told everyone just to be very careful when eating the eggs later.


The egg hunt went well. The grandchildren found them all. My nephew Logan (probably 8 at the time) had a stuffed snake ... it was so long he could coil it around his neck and still have plenty of snake left to scare cousins with. He jumped out at Abby (age 4) & scared her with his snake. Abby was so startled that she dropped her basket. And that's when we found some of the raw eggs! Of course, it ruined her chocolate bunny.

Logan felt so badly about it that he gave his bunny to Abby.That was a really special memory for me because it showed what a kind, concerned young man Logan already was, and still is. He was only 8 but already understood how to show Jesus's love to other people.

Crystal Editor's note: Now, see why I love Marti? She's a genius storyteller. She should be writing Hoosier novels. Just my professional opinion.

Marti's book of children's sermons is coming out in CSS's Fall catalog. It is, as yet, untitled (though it could possibly be: Four-minute Lessons for Young Ears, Eyes, and Hearts. )


She's published with Contemporary Drama Service:
Broadcasting Christmas
Mini-Musicals for Special Days

She also has written stories in compilation books, including Chicken Soup for the Shopper's Soul.

Her CD reviews appear at http://buddyhollywood.com
(Check under Marti Kramer Suddarth.)

Red Veda's latest CD

Oh, one more thing to mention: she's a Daughter of the American Revolution and an expert in genealogy. Marti is one of the unrecognized geniuses of our time. Keep an eyeball on her.

Hot off the press! Looking for a book to help with your children's sermons? Marti has written it!


Ping-Pong Words
And 30 More Children's Sermons
By: Marti Kramer Suddarth
CSS Publishing Co., Inc.


CSS Price: $12.95

CSS Item #: 0788024841

When I Was Just a Kid...Next Week
We were all just kids once. Here, you can go back to being a kid, if only for a little while.

Just wanted to let you know who will be featured next week in this blog.


Monday April 9: Tricia Goyer

You've met Tricia here before. She's written several books ,both fiction and nonfiction, but has stories about herself, as well.

Wednesday April 11: Deb Raney

Besides writing wonderful women's fiction (where one of her novels has been made into a movie, A Vow to Cherish) Deb writes a column with her now-married daughter, Tobi, at crosswalk.com. The column is about marriage and makes an interesting read as they talk about their own relationships.

Friday April 13: Teena Stewart, SALT Sister

Teena is a prolific writer who has published over a 1000 articles, and will publish a book on small groups soon with Beacon Hill. She does so many things, it makes my head swim! From writing suspense, a blog about writing suspense, her Ministry in Motion, plus a myriad of ministries, and partnering with her pastor husband, as well. She will also be mother of the bride this summer as the oldest of her three children is getting married. I co-wrote a few parenting articles with Teena and we are in the same group, SALT: Struggling Artists of Literary Talent, which she founded.


To all of my Christian friends, I wish you a blessed Easter. He is risen! Peace to you.

And to all of my Jewish friends, I've been reading along, celebrating Passover with you. Thank you for being keepers of the faith in the One True God.
Shabbat Chol HaMoed of Passover
In the Torah : Exodus 12:21–51
Haftarah : Joshua 3:5–7, 5:2–6:1, 6:27

Happy Birthday, April!

When I Was Just a Kid...Jim Watkins

When I Was Just a Kid....

Jim Watkins

This guy grew up to be a rather dangerous man. You can see it in the squint of his little eyeballs, can't you? Even as a youngster he was out getting the bad guys, like his hero, The Lone Ranger.

Today's Kid is Jim Watkins who writes "heavy topics with a light touch." (He's funny but he carries a big stick.) And he's logical. What he says just makes good horse sense.

He's married to an equally creative and wise person, Lois, and they have two grown-up kids who married and each gave them an adorable grandkid. Check out Lois' link, as well, because she writes food for your soul. On a personal note, Jim helped me with my first web site and has been an encourager to me in writing, which he does for many, many people through his teaching and ministries.

Here's Jim:

Childhood Ambition: My two childhood heroes were The Lone Ranger (that's me on "Silver") and magician Mark Wilson on "Magic Land of Allakazam." Since there weren't alot of job openings for "daring and resourceful masked men," I planned on becoming a magician. (I actually performed at birthday parties, church carry-ins and Boy Scout Banquets as a teenager.)

Fondest Memory (then): The Christmas I got my "Sneaky Pete" magic set and my American Flyer electric train.

Proudest Moment (now or then):

Then-In high school, winning a national award for the school paper I edited.

Now-Winning a Campus Life "Book of the Year" award for The Why Files.

In-between, the birth of my two children (now adults with their own children.)

Biggest Challenge as a child or teen: Trying to win my parents' approval, but that's something to discuss with a court-appointed psychiatrist rather than blog readers.

My First Job: While I made money picking strawberries, mowing lawns, and performing magic, my first full-time job during summer breaks from college was putting raisins in Raisin Bran at Kellogg's of Battle Creek.

Childhood indulgence: Chocolate chip cookies, German chocolate cake

Favorite thing to do as a child: Performing magic, creating a large layout for my electric trains.

Favorite Childhood Movie:"The Lone Ranger" (1949) although I'm too young to have seen the original release.

Favorite Childhood Book: Any books on magic

Childhood hero:(See above)

Anything else you'd like readers to know about you as a child: Most of those records are sealed by the courts.

Crystal Ed.'s note: Told you he was dangerous. By the way--he's really just kidding--as you might know, because he's a funny, funny guy!]

Jim: I remember, in second grade, re-writing the story of Pinnochio since I thought the suspension of disbelief was stretched too far with the "live" puppet becoming a live boy. So, I had Pinnochio die a prolonged, painful death of death elm disease. (Maybe a court-appointed psychiatrist is not a bad idea!)

Jim says: "I also loved writing [as a child]--which is now what I'm doing rather than magic and"leading the fight for law and order in the early west."

[Crystal Ed.'s note: Jim is doing all three childhood things--writing, being magical, and leading the fight for law and order, if you ask me.]

Crystal Editor :I don't have enough room in my little blog to tell you all the things he does, has done, will do. His official bio says it best:

Jim says: "I read somewhere that people with several part-time jobs are happier than people with one full-time job, so I'm an:

• author of twelve books and over two thousand articles

• acquistions editor for Wesleyan Publishing House

• conference speaker throughout North America and overseas

• editorial advisor for ACW Press

• online professor at Taylor University Fort Wayne

• threat to society• child of God.

The items above are what I do, but not who I am. Whether I succeed or fail in those jobs, I know that my identity is secure in being an unconditionally loved child of God."

CE: Check out all of his writing from blog to articles to books at :

"Jim Watkins: Heavy topics with a light touch"

Books to read by Jim:

1. Communicate toChange Lives

(from Wesleyan Publishing House)

2. Characters: Comedies and Dramas

3. Should a Christian Wear Purple Sweat Socks?

4. The Why Files: Are There Really Ghosts?

5. The Why Files: Is There Really Life After Death?

6. The Why Files: When Can I Start Dating?

7. Writers On Writing:

Top Christian Authors Share Their Secrets for Getting Published

CE: That should keep you busy for a few days!

Teena Stewart

Busy? Yeah, Me, Too






Crystal, out wrestling alligators









I am an introvert. In fact on the scale of introversion to extroversion, I am negative 5 to the introversion side. (Well, almost. I scored no extroversion points at all.) Lately I've been interacting a lot with people, whom I love, and I do LOVE to be with them, but then I have to recharge. Today I'm exhausted. Forgive me if I'm mumbling.
On top of that, I seem to be in the public eyeball in the last few days, which makes me nervous.I feel totally unworthy and like a nutcase whenever this happens and get gibberishly insecure with thoughts like, "People will really hate me now," to what I think others' are saying behind my back, "What makes her so special? I know her, and she's a drip!" But I'm finally getting enough years on me that my tune is finally changing to,"I've lived long enough to say what I want and suffer the consequences." I shudder to think of how I will be if I reach the age of my grandmother (92.)
But I still tend to want to withdraw after being highlighted somewhere. However, the people who took time to put me there are really great people, and I would be remiss if I did not point some of these things out.
Writer Teena Stewart has more energy than the sun, I think. She runs a ministry for pastors called Ministry in Motion, as well as has written 1000s of articles, and now is publishing a book on small groups (more on that as the book is closer to publication.) I have co-written parenting articles with her and she has been in my critique/SALT support group for years(in fact, she started it!) She is artistic (paints fabulous furniture pieces, as well as commissioned paintings) and she now is working on fiction. She likes writing suspenseful and macabe-type stories--and some of them are a little chilling! She's finished a few manuscripts and I think you will soon be able to buy her published fiction. Oh, yeah. She's a web master. She knows html and all that stuff.
She started a blog for suspense writers and is featuring a piece I wrote ( will appear over several days) about getting ready for fiction contests. With the American Christian Fiction Writers Genesis contest coming up, some of you may be interested in that. I don't have all the answers and I can't predict how a judge will react to your manuscript. I can tell you how I've judged manuscripts and a little of the criteria judges have to use. Of course, some of what I say, another judge may dispute, but hey, reading is subjective. Just ask an author who just got a scathing review! One of the main questions I hear writers asking is "To prologue or not to prologue. That is the question." If you need a prologue, write a prologue. But really need it if you do. My take on that. (How many prologues have you skimmed in your reading?)



Teena, wife to a pastor, busy mentor, prolific article writer, author, traveler,artist, speaker,webmaster,mom to 3, soon-to-be mom-to-the-bride and tough-love-critique-friend.









Next, I have to tell you--this blog was featured in a magazine called Savvy and the article will be up on the web site for the month of April, while the print magazine can be picked up in the Muncie area during that time. If you have come here because of that article, thanks for checking this place out! Go back into the archives for nostalgia. And do check out the links on the right.
This blog is mostly for nostalgia and things I am interested in telling you (or really, telling myself.) I do have a whole 'nuther persona who has professionally "fixed" fiction, done hundreds of published book reviews, and written client viabilities for agencies. I have some favorite authors/agents/editors who write about writing, and some you can check out at the right. But I do want to highlight author Tricia Goyer's new blog on writing called, My Writing Mentor. She called in some top guns to post for today and if you are a writer, you will want to check this out. One of her featured mentors, James Scott Bell ,has written one of the books I recommend all the time on writing, Write Great Fiction: Plot and Structure.
Be sure to come back here all month to check out the childhoods (with photos!) of various people I've interviewed. I was a little amazed that so many couldn't track down photos of themselves as a child. (They're not THAT old. Cameras go way back.) If you have left your parents' home, do be sure to ask for a few childhood photos. It's good to reflect on how you have grown and have a record of that.
Ok, back to hanging out in my cave. (Don't throw a can at me, Diann! I'm not really a bat.)

Menu Items for April

April brings showers and here at the Chat 'n' Chew, we're set for folks coming in to join us for homecooked goodness (and to get in out of the rain.)

This month I will be hosting special guests to the diner to give you a little glimpse into their past lives. I called in my markers and got photos from those pasts. Then, I asked them highly personal questions. Nibby questions, like who their childhood hero was and what indulgence did they remember adoring indulging in. (One liked throwing cans at bats...watch out for THAT one...)

To give you a little taste of who will be revealing all, take a look at next week's victims(-er-guests):

Monday, April 2: Mary Connealy

Mary is an author, mother of four girls and married to a farmer--all of whom she sort of used in writing her first published novel, Petticoat Ranch. She may well be one of the funniest people I know with a different sort of childhood, like having parents who pieced houses together to accomodate their large family (literally-speaking!) And she's just a good sport for putting up with me.

Wednesday, April 4: Jim Watkins
Jim is a dangerous man. And it's no wonder because he grew up that way--emulating his childhood hero. Check out Wednesday's featured guest, who grew up to write heavy topics with a light touch. He's a mentor in writing for me (and lots of others--he runs the Sandy Cove Writers Conference) and a fellow Hoosier.

Friday, April 6: Marti Suddarth

Marti is your everyday heroine in red hair. She can write a tune, play, or sermon for kids and still manage to teach in school all day, keep her family in the pampering style they have grown accustomed to, and keep Splash the Wonder Dog of beagle persuasion from raiding the neighborhood. She is one Hoosier who is more Hoosier than I am. Marti's been in my SALT critique/support group (Struggling Artists of Literary Talent) for years--and the first of my SALT Sisters to be featured.

I am hoping we'll have fun digging into the past, though not all childhood memories are good. But these things are the stuff which helped to form some pretty great people in my life. I am getting dirt, I mean, info, in daily from the likes of DiAnn Mills, Diann Hunt, Colleen Coble, Denise Hunter, Tricia Goyer, Sabrina Fox, Deb Raney, Judy Gann...and well, I could probably do this for a long time(and hope I do because I've enjoyed this.) If you find that these prompts trigger your own memories, and I haven't yet emailed you (you're probably on my list...) then please, send me your email address and I'll have you spilling the beans in no time. It'll be fun. (We'll have cornbread with it...)

And be sure to leave a comment if you have a memory from your own childhood to share with us as each person is featured.

I can't wait to get started!

And to tease you a little--Can you figure out who this cutie is(already writing?)

Growing Up

What were you like as a child? Did you have a hero? Did you have a moment where you felt proud of what you had done? Did you have a pasttime that shaped you and your future career? (By the way--I still have this dress, but I can no longer wear it...) I've shared, haphazardly, some of my childhood memories, photos here, as I've gone through some of the pictures that I inherited from my parents.

I love children--it's why I became a teacher first, and then, when I married, had children of my own. Now that my children are grown and nearly grown, I find myself looking back at my childhood--my growing up years--and looking at those things that shaped the old lady I've become (by virtue of passing a few birthdays.) I try to share some of those memories with my own boys, and now, with you.

Since I've passed a milestone--logged my 100th post--and since I'm living in the year leading up to my Jubilee year, I'm finding ways to release those things I've stayed slave to so I can accept my birthday with grace and a thankful heart. One way to do that is to celebrate childhoods. Not everyone's childhood was lollipops and lilac bushes. Mine certainly wasn't. But there is still something precious in each person--joyful--something that is worth celebrating, no matter what your circumstances in your childhood were. Because of that, I've been asking some people about their childhoods. Many have already agreed to share with us here. And I've managed to dig up a few photos.

Next Monday I hope you return here and I'll begin the posts of those I've gathered, doling them out over many weeks and months. (I'm still sending out requests and waiting for replies of some.)Maybe it will prompt you to think about your own childhood days--and find those special moments that made you into the person you are today. I'll let you know who is going to be coming up with a list.

My mother-in-law, Imy, will be 89 years old on April 1st(first born and an April Fool's gift!) She has seen so much and she remembers a lot from her growing up years. I want to share some about her this week, because she's an amazing and interesting person (and funny!) She has been a mentor to many of us. She's what is called a "notch" baby, and her son and I are baby boomers, so that right there puts us into a special relationship. She was 39 years old when she had her second child(my husband) and 41 with a two-year-old when she had her first grandchild (our Tina, niece who is like a sister.)

I hope you will enjoy reading these as much as I have. And I promise to have some photos of those persons as children/young people.

"Even a child is known by his actions, by whether his conduct is pure and right."

~~Proverbs 20:11

Big Sky, Big Thoughts

Transfiguration Chapel, Montana

Big Sky, Big Thoughts


Today is my 100th post! And in honor of that, I'm taking a trip--to Big Sky Country (that would be Montana)to talk to someone who lives there.(All by internet--ain't it a cool world?) I was in Montana right after I graduated from high school. It was gorgeous country and I loved every moment of being there--including the Saturday night on a Native American reservation. You felt as if you could walk right out on the clouds up on Going to the Sun Road. And I'll never forget Gunshot Pass or the Bighorn sheep who baaaed at us and told us to get out their way! (Yikes.)



Tricia Goyer lives in Montana and that's who I want you to know, if you don't already. No wonder she has big thoughts.

She is not that old, but yet she has been places in the world and the past. She has helped us to remember big events, and the courageous people in those events through her fiction. My favorite genre is historical fiction--and Tricia is one of my favorite authors in this area. That's why I am thrilled to be part of her blog tour with her new historical, Valley of Betrayal. While her other novels have been set in WWII (I personally know and have known WWII vets, even in my own family,)this one is set in Spain during the Spanish Civil War before WWII.


Tricia was researching her fourth World War II novel, Arms of Deliverance, when she ran across an autobiography of a B-17 crewmember. He said he made it out of German-occupied Belgium after a plane crash due to his skills he picked up as a vet of the Spanish Civil War.

Tricia said, "Reading that bit of information, I had to scratch my head. First of all, I had never heard of the war.And second, what was an American doing fighting in Spain in the late 1930s? Before I knew it, I uncovered a fascinating time in history—one that I soon discovered many people know little about. This is what I learned:

Nazi tanks rolled across the hillsides and German bombers roared overhead, dropping bombs on helpless citizens. Italian troops fought alongside the Germans, and their opponents attempted to stand strong—Americans, British, Irishmen, and others—in unison with other volunteers from many countries. And their battleground? The beautiful Spanish countryside."

Tricia is passionate when it comes to telling stories. It shows in the telling of this story of a war that lasted from July 17, 1936-April 1, 1939. Her character Sophie,an American,falls in love, and ends up in Spain right as the civil war bursts into conflict, and for reasons beyond her control, she ends up alone. The beautiful paradise rips open into a battlefield with fascist soldiers pitted against Spanish patriots. Her safety route is blocked, and she falls right into the firepit of fighting. She ends up taking refuge with a brigade of international volunteer compatriots--and she tells the story of these people through the power of her art.

This is what stood out to me--Picasso also portrayed portions of this war in his art. If you are an art afficionado, then this story will appeal to you as art is an important part of the character, Sophie. Then, there are the athletes. History fills the pages of this book and if you need to understand the times, the history of this war, this is the way to do it. Her attention to details and the history are superior.

In Tricia's words:

"On one side were the Spanish Republicans, joined by the Soviet Union and The International Brigade—men and women from all over the world who have volunteered to fight Fascism. Opposing them, Franco and his Fascist military leaders, supported with troops, machinery, and weapons from Hitler and Mussolini. The Spanish Civil War, considered the “training ground” for the war to come, boasted of thousands of American volunteers who joined to fight on the Republican side, half of which never returned home."

But in this war there wasn't that "good guys triumphing over the bad guys" because there just wasn't a clear good guy/bad guy. Both sides did horrible things. Both sides had passion for their cause. To sort out who was whom, Tricia has a glossary in the book explaining the people involved:

Loyalists—
also know as the Republicans were aided by the Soviet Union, the Communist movement, and the International Brigades. If not for the weapons and volunteers from these sources their fight would have ended in weeks rather than years. While many men fought side by side, their political views included that of liberal democracy, communism and socialism. The Catholic Basque Country also sided with the Republic, mainly because it sought independence from the central government and was promised this by Republican leaders in Madrid.

Nationalists
—or Francoists were aided mainly by Germany and Italy. The Nationalist opposed an independent Basque state. Their main supporters were those who believed in a monarchist state and fascist interests. The Nationalist wished for Spain to continue on as it had for years, with rich landowners, the military, and the church running the country. Most of the Roman Catholic clergy supported the Nationalists, except those in the Basque region.

"An estimated one million people lost their lives during this conflict, and terror tactics to civilians were common," Tricia explains. "These are the stories behind A Valley of Betrayal."

If you enjoy historical fiction, then this is one to pick up because it tells a different war story and is set in the gorgeous countryside of Spain--not to mention the descriptions of the artist's work through the character of Sophie.

The things I so like about Tricia is how responsive she is on her blogs--and how she cares so deeply about people. She's open and tells her own story throughout the blogs she keeps and you'll find her own story on Generation X Parents--there's always a story big as the sky with a love big as the sky with Other books by Tricia Goyer:
Fiction:
From Dust and Ashes: A Story of Liberation
Night Song: A Story of Sacrifice
Dawn of a Thousand Nights
Arms of Deliverance: A Story of Promise
Night Song: A Story of Sacrifice

Nonfiction:
Generation NeXt Parenting: A Savvy Parent's Guide to Getting it Right

Life Interrupted: The Scoop on Being a Young Mom (Mothers of Preschoolers (Mops))

Big ideas and stories come from Big Sky Country--through Tricia.

Egg-zactly Spring!

EGG-ZACTLY SPRING!














This is not a trick.





Spring has OFFICIALLY arrived. This egg stood on end without assistance of any kind at exactly 8:07 p.m. in Indiana and it lasted almost 10 minutes before falling over.

Awesome,huh? My son, Max, has a science teacher who said it could be done, so he went out, stood the egg on end and it worked! When it finally fell over, no matter how he tried to stand it up, it wouldn't. Thus, spring has come. And we saw it--live, in person.

I've been dragging for a couple months. Had the flu for about two weeks. Was depressed, and feeling frumpy. I asked my girls (a group I've talked about before) for advice on a makeover. I mean, I have been in the dumpster attitude-wise. But this little experiment, demonstration, made me wonder at the awesomeness of God and the fun He must have thinking this stuff up. I almost danced with giddiness, and it was great to see Max's face when it really happened.

So, here's to Ms. Goshorn for suggesting it to her students. And here's to God for allowing me to see it happen--spring arrived and maybe I'll make it, after all.

I got this from Just a Little Smoother in Your Hand: A Little Stone blog. Kind of fun. You might get the feeling I'm a bookworm with a cheeseburger and a Coke. Hmm.

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Almost Spring

Almost Spring

Spring usually comes in staggering steps around here in Hoosierland. Today it is 70, I have the windows thrown open, and I hear little birdies who have been absent for months. My daffodils are peeking out of the soil and the buds are beginning to swell. It looks like Mudlavia around here, but most of the snow has melted. Motorcycles are roaring around, taking advantage of the window of weather.

But come Friday we are supposed to plunge back into the 30s. Probably will freeze whatever has survived thus far. A few years ago I spent this time of year in Savannah, Georgia. I made my husband click a photo (though I hate photos) in front of this gorgeous azalea bush at a gun club where we were competing. It was just plain unbelievable to me that in the same world where we had left a blizzard and measurable feet of snow, this was blooming.

So it is in life. In one part of the world it is nice and happy, and in another place it is cold and dreary. I belong to a little group of writers who have kept in touch by email for many years now(and occasionally we have critiqued one another.) Two are in California, one in Illinois, one in Georgia, one in Alaska, one in Ohio and two of us are on opposite ends of Indiana. We share our lives, the weather, prayer requests, latest writing adventures or dreams. We've done makeovers, laughed with delight, and cried when one of us has hurt. We've celebrated a wedding, an honorary doctorate, a real estate license exam passing score, two graduations from college and getting a job, book contracts, selling articles, and buying a new home.But we've also mourned deaths, loss of jobs, marriage, illnesses with close family and ourselves, and disappointments of various natures in writing.

I live in the never-ending "almost spring" lately when it comes to writing. I know that there are plenty of others who have bloomed and are living their dreams in spring and summer. I've edited quite a few of those dreams that became realities. I'm not even sure what I'm doing anymore with my own writing. And I've been so ill recently, I can't even concentrate on editing. (Hopefully, this is going to pass soon as I have several waiting.)

They say spring is coming. I'll believe it when I see it!

(I know, I know--hang in there, Crystal! I am. I think.)

I have a new blonde joke up on my web site . Click on "Blonde."

Notice Any Changes??

Tweak, tweak, find, find. I like to improve upon systems, looks, etc. I changed some things here.

First of all I added a quote up above in the header. Love that quote. It relates to my tagline: Mostly Homespun, Thoroughly Hoosier.

Next, I added a widget thingie from my friend MacroMoments' and her Photo Buffet.(Got to have a buffet in a cafe', right??) She has the best photographs, and I enjoy her insights into life that she writes on her blog. I wish I could frame her photographs and put them into my house. Maybe we'll be able to buy her photos in a book one day soon--and when that happens, I'll be the first to buy that book!

Next, my friend and fellow wordsmith, Terry Whalin, has so much to tell writers about viral marketing and about the conference he just attended--so I added the "Find this page interesting? Send this page to a friend!" that he directed readers and writers to check out. That's just fun. I'm always amazed that anyone reads this blog, and I'm always so happy to get a comment, but this invites you to share the link with a friend. Thanks, Terry!

You can get the widget from MacroMoment's blog or make your own. You can also get the "Send this page to a friend," button.


Finally, maybe you've wondered what the Feedblitz box is to the right where you can enter your email address. If you would like my blog to be delivered to your email box, this is the place to sign up. If you sign up and would rather just come to the blog (which is the only way to track the traffic and readers) then you can unsubscribe, so it's not like a forever thing. It really is just a convenience for readers. I am signed up for several of the blogs listed in my links and when I'm really busy, I just read them in my email box (and can download them.) I also know when they've made a new post.


It is a gadgety world. I love gadgets, though I don't always understand them. I like sparkles and blings and worky things. If I find anything else, I'll be sure to let you know.

By the way, be sure to check out
Christian Women Online. There are articles, other blogs (lots!) and plenty of blings and buttons. It's a fun place to explore.

Back to the Future

Do you ever wish you could go back in time? Punch a few buttons, and you're back at that pivotal moment when you could have gone this way--or that way? Where would you set the "way back" machine?

I don't think that way. Going forward is my way, but somehow in writing this blog, I am looking back. And people have said to me, "How do you remember all that stuff?" I don't know. I don't even know why I am looking back at all of those memories, except that it is what has woven me into what I am now. And I love stories.

See this Farrah Fawcett hair on this girl looking toward her future? Well, I don't feel as if I am much different from her. I still have the same personality and temperament. I still sparkle with amusement. I still flair with anger at injustice. I still talk with my eyes. (I used to have teachers and people tell me I had this trait.) My teeth have been straightened since then, and I have a scar under my lip on the left side now from a head-on collision that I surprisingly survived.

I feel a bit of change coming in this blog, however. I'm old (in case you don't know me, I look EXACTLY the same as this photo...) I am approaching my Year of Jubilee. On the one hand I am reaching forward, striving to that goal. On the other hand, well, who wants to be old? And sit around saying, "Heh, heh, I remember when I walked to class in Colorado hiking boots and a down-filled coat, uphill both ways, in the Blizzard of '78 and was glad to do it! I remember the Energy Crisis!" (Sheesh. There is nothing new under the sun.)

Some things are worse now for me. A lot of things are better. And I'm just happy to be here and glad that you are, too.

Building Blocks

Building Blocks


I like my life in neat blocks of time. I like for things to go like clockwork. It is my preference for my lists of things to do to be checked off--in order, thankewverrymuuuuch. I don't like changes in the schedule or "going with the flow." So, of course, God gave me this life that is a minute-by-minute surprise or panic. He put me in the middle of chaos and unpredictability and said, "Trust me." Ha. Well, I still struggle but He is endlessly patient. He can wait forever.

Watching my boys come to a place where they are making decisions about their futures has caused me to look back on my own life and see what kinds of building blocks of time I've stacked up. There are a few blocks I could've done without, I think. If I could go back, I might have picked up a "T" block instead of that "U" block, or I might have put the blocks in neat rows instead of circling them. God gives us these piles of blocks, and we can't use them all. We have to make choices and then do something with them.

One thing that would have helped me is if I could have found out my temperament sooner. Something about seeing the commonality in a temperament would have given me more confidence about how I felt about some choices. Some choices were made for me--I didn't have any money, and a certain college offered me full scholarship while ones I thought I wanted to attend didn't offer me much or were a lot more expensive. I had this thing about not wanting to go into major debt. As it were, the way I chose assured that I graduated free and clear. Not bad for the first person and generation college graduate on one side of my family, huh? God helped me along the way with offers of jobs right in my field of study. Doors opened and some closed, but I was blessed with opportunities in teaching when almost all of my fellow graduates ended up in another field due to lack of teaching jobs.

At one point in my teaching career I had enough. One of my students had been murdered. Others, beaten by parents, and administrators who didn't do their jobs made teaching not what I had signed up for. It was too much. I hung up my chalk and clipboard and said, "That's it. I didn't sign up for this stuff and I can't take this grief."

I contacted a school about a career in dentistry. I figured this would be a job where I could indulge my meticulous nature, work with people, but people wouldn't be dying on me. I could find ways to make a feared procedure comfortable and I'd be pleasant. Plus, I'd have great teeth.

I met with the admissions guy. He came to my apartment to talk it over with me. I don't know what I said, or what it was about me, but he told me I was exactly the kind of student they were looking for--motivated, smart with experience with people already under my belt, plus I already had a bachelor's degree. But....

There's always a "but" in your life, isn't there? He cautioned me not to make a hasty choice and change just because some bad things had happened. I assured him that I was ready for this change. I wanted to do something else. But...he discouraged me. He told me to not rush into this.

I wish I had pursued another avenue or pressed forward in this quest. My husband was in school, and we would've had to take out another loan for me, so that was strike one. I needed a job of some sort--strike two. My husband said years later that he should've pushed me to go ahead and get another degree, but he was busy and occupied at the time with his own studies.

So, I found another teaching job and it appeared to be the "perfect" place. Two years later another student was dead at the hands of his mother and that was the final straw for me--I left teaching for several years. The timing worked out as my husband had graduated, had a job that took care of the both of us, and we had our first of four boys. I took a maternity leave and didn't go back to teaching for 8 years. By the way--my first child was born on his due date--as it should be for someone like me. When I returned to teaching, it was in P.E. and that was my favorite job of all the jobs I had. Unfortunately, life's circumstances caused us to move and I didn't get to continue in that job. I flailed about for another 10 years until now after that.

But now they have tests to give you to help you make wise choices for you and your personality. I didn't discover this until a couple years ago. It won't save you from tough choices or grief-filled moments or frustrations, because no matter how "perfect" a job is for you, there will always be something that will grind your teeth. However, if you are in an environment that you "fit," it helps you to press onward and still have a love and enthusiasm, despite the hardships that just come with life. I'm too old to go back to the beginning, so I'll have to adjust according to my age, but at least I still have time as long as I'm still breathing in and out to find a few more things to do. I can now cut out the "I hate doing thats" and finally do some things I love.

If you are interested in finding out your Myers-Briggs profile, here is a link where you can take a free test. You can also pay a small fee for possible career matches or go to the Ball State University career site and see matches for your profile. They even list some possible majors that this particular university offers to give you an idea of what kind of career might suit you.

Even if you are my age, this is useful. It's helped me to assess where I have come from, and then, has helped me in deciding "what next?" for me. It has allowed me to understand certain people in my life so I can better respond to them. Plus, I am more able to help others find their path, which probably satisfies a part of me that wasn't quite fulfilled. It's all for the good.

What's Your Name?

Well, what do you want it to be?

If I remember right, these are lines from the movie,Pretty Woman when the two main characters first meet. It's transformation, Cinderella-love story where a hooker, living hand-to-mouth, enters the life of a millionaire one evening when he was "lost." Not only does he change her life, she changes him. And she doesn't change him into something he's not--she brings back the "real" him--the man who wants to build things, create things. Up until this point, he's been spending his whole career tearing things down in revenge because his father never recognized him for who he was, and tore him down. And she, who had been living a life that made her constantly pretend to be who she wasn't, would morph into "whatever" the fantasy of the person using her desired. She was dying in this lifestyle, but so was he.

This week one of my sons has been exploring who he is, and what kind of life's work he's been called to doing. He started off in an area that seemed perfect for him, but after two years he explained to my husband and me that he wants "to help people and work with people," not being alone doing his own thing as the path of the major he was in was leading him to be. So, we arranged for him to be tested and he'll talk to a career counselor. This counselor will in turn offer suggestions based on an interview and his answers to the over 500 questions on how he thinks, how he feels about circumstances, his real choices and what makes him joyful. He has to think about lifestyles and environments of work and how he would like them to be in his own life.

As we went through some of the questions, I couldn't help thinking that I wish I could've had this kind of assistance when I was his age. And also, I got to know my son in a deeper way than I ever have known him before, despite the fact that there were some questions I knew the answer to before he even voiced it. I thought I knew him better than anyone, but there were still things to be learned about him.

But despite age, and being in circumstances you don't think you can change, as long as you have breath and mind, you can adjust your lifestyle into who you really are. Don't let people try to mold you into what their image of you is; be transformed, renew your mind into what you were called and meant to be, despite your past. I think that is the true message in the movie, Pretty Woman. In this movie he asks her at the end--"What happened when he saves her?" She answers, "She saves him right back." They help each other to become better people. Their lives change for the good.

You might think it is too late, but you have to move forward right now from where you are. Be brave. Make one change. It could be in your volunteer work or it could be a career change,a lifestyle change or it could be changing where you live. The one thing it shouldn't be--changing and leaving people devastated and hurt in your quest. But don't be miserable or contribute unhappiness to people in your life because you didn't get to play guitar as a kid, or you couldn't take art classes. Eliminate the "drains" in your life. And then, find one thing that feeds your soul so you can give back to the people in your life. Pretty Woman character Vivian does this--she talks to her roommate and fellow hooker and builds her up, gives her a "scholarship" in life to make positive changes.

I am a Christian. In the Bible there is a verse that is based in Jewish culture that says, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not turn from it." (Proverbs 22:6) This proverb has been interpreted a lot of ways by my fellow Believers in raising children, and by the Jewish people, too, but I think it's not only about your spiritual life--but your entire lifestyle. People have a way of separating their job-life from their spiritual life. After all, where I live, you are not supposed to mix "church and state." I say this is fundamentally impossible to do, because eventually one or the other system will collapse. It is core to your value system. What you train up your child into is your value system. I'm not saying that you have to wear your spiritual life on your sleeve or subject people to it in an aggressive manner--I'm saying it's not like fashions you put on or take off according to the occasion--it is a part of who you are, your fabric of your life, your DNA, despite the window dressings, your culture.

So, my son was answering these questions and it tells a story about him. He is like this not because I raised him this way, because he has three brothers who are distinctly different from him, and we raised those boys the same way. But all four boys have the same value system. We also raised each one in the way they should go by offering them experiences in their strengths or preferences. He is a certain way, a certain temperament. He can "pretend" he is something else by participating in an activity because someone pressures him to do it. He can even live his life a way differently from who is he, but until he is doing things in the way of his temperament, he will either collapse, or he will become ill, or be very unhappy. Training him up in the way that he should go involves more than discovering his spiritual gifts and how he fits into the family of God, giving him his value system--it also involves what he should be doing in his life's work and how he should be spending his days, his life.

Eventually the lifestyle that comes with the job is going to cause a collapse if it is not "you." Either physically, mentally or spiritually something will collapse, if your temperament isn't jiving with the way you are spending your time.

So, what is your temperament? Where do you want to be this time next year?

Snow Day




I have a friend who lives where they don't see snow. She wistfully made the comment that she wished that she could have a day like I just had where she could be "snowed in." I was quick to point out all the hazards and worries I had about this kind of treacherous weather because our family is all too aware of the dangers, and have to get out in it to help. But.

She triggered memories of the days when I didn't worry about those things (like semi-trucks jackkniving on the interstate or freezing to death, or frost bite or electricity going out and not being able to get to the loved one.Yeah, my brain has been adultatized. Kill me.)

It started with her comment--then my husband and I went outside to assess the huge drifts of snow after the blizzard stopped. Our cars were blocked in, and we wanted to see if our new snow blower would do the job. And how it did! Before it was all over, we were fighting each other to blow out the driveway with that snow blower. If a huge snowblower on a tractor manned by a local farmer neighbor hadn't shown up coming down our rural one-lane county road, I'm not so sure we wouldn't have blown out all the snow on the road, too. It was...yeah, ok, fun! My husband joked that the snow blower was my Valentine's Day present, and frankly, it was the most fun I'd had in a while.

I found this photo above of my boys from several years ago when we had a similar blizzard with drifts over 6 feet high, and they thought it was the most fun thing that had ever happened to them. My memories flew back to when I was their age looking at this photo, fueled by my California friend's comment, and our snow blowing fun.

The small Christian school I attended from 1st to 5th grade only had two rooms for 8 grades. Our teachers were a couple--the man taught 5th-8th and the lady taught 1st-4th. We were like a big family. And when we were at school and the snow was piled to the rooftop, Mr. Clayburn said we should build a snowman at recess. But it wasn't just any snowman--it was the abominable snowman! He was over 8 feet tall when we got done and the newspaper sent a photographer to save it for all times and show everyone else. Except, I don't know what happened to that photograph. We were really proud and probably every one of us kept that memory. At least I hope so.

I remember snow forts and huge snowball fights with Phil and Rick and Susan and Karen and Mary Beth. It was a blast! But one time I threw a snowball at the retreating losers, Rick and Phil, as they ducked into the garage. They shut the door just as I let it fly. Smack! Yep. It went right through the glass. I sat there on the icy ground, behind the walls of our fort, and I was so upset, the walls began to melt. Or at least seemed to. I just knew I was grounded for all time. I tredged slowly to the house, went straight to my dad and told him what I'd done.

He got on his snow gear--boots, coat and that toboggan hat that made him look like a lumberjack, and carefully picked up pieces of glass from the ice. Then, he went to town, bought a new glass and installed it himself. I hung around there like I was at a funeral home. Didn't want to be there, but I stuck around anyway. I kept waiting for him to yell at me, saying,"What are you! Dumb? Didn't you know that a snowball would break the glass? Don't you know that costs money? Didn't you know it was a foolish thing to do?" (Well, my dad didn't exactly talk like this, but it was filtered through my own voice in my head, chewing me out...chewing me out in my own chastising way.)

He never did chew me out. He just grinned and fixed the window. He said, "All fixed." He never yelled. Never lectured me. He didn't even say, "Don't do that anymore." He didn't beat me, smack me, but also he didn't yell. Or even correct me.I mean, I was pretty much perfect, but even I needed someone to tell me I'd done wrong once in a while.

I never understood why he didn't get mad back then, and it wasn't until one day when I was older that I "got it." You know. That age that your mother predicted as, "Just wait until you are a mom!"? And at that time I remembered another story--my dad telling a really funny story to us about how when he was a little boy, and how crazy he was about Superman.

He had seen a movie in the theater and just was wild about Superman--pretending he was Superman all the time. He was jumping and "flying" off this and that, and one day he climbed up on the chicken coop. With cape flying he flew right off the roof. He landed on his back on a "stob"(which was some cut off small tree stump.) It knocked the wind out of him and he couldn't breathe.

His dad ran over, stood over him saying, "Are you all right? Can you breathe?" Dad said he gulped for air and finally said, "Yessir, I think I'm getting my 'breaf' back." (Dad was very Southern and this was more how he talked.) Dad had a way of telling the most horrific story with humor and a twinkle in his eye--like it was actually funny. Then, he went on with the "kicker:"

"As soon as I got to my feet, Daddy kicked my butt all over the yard."

His daddy was so upset about him nearly killing himself, that he beat him to emphasize not to ever do that again. Yeah.

My dad had his own major faults, but one thing he did magnificently--he broke the abuse cycle passed from father to kids. He corrected us without beating us half to death, or for that matter, at all. And he was able to fit the punishment with the crime. I'm not even sure how he did this--unless it was my mother's influence on him, or the fact that he never wanted to treat us like his dad treated him.

And before you go thinking how horrible my Granddaddy was--he, too, broke his bad habits as he aged, and I didn't know this part of him. I think my mother influenced him, too.

Snow day. I have a lot of stories about snow, snow play, and blizzards. I've told them to my kids, and my kids have their own stories, too. I warned them not to throw snowballs at windows, but I did it with a smile, and they have never known beatings like my dad endured--and neither have I.

1000 Gifts

480. snow blower!
481. electricity
482. snow plows getting us out so we can go to the store,etc.
483. my warm, plush navy blue slippers and gray robe
484. hot coffee
485. a husband who can "fix" things
486. kids who take the dog out in the cold so I don't have to
487. games to play
488. nice comments from readers because they are nice people
489. my green hoodie sweatshirt from Mackinac
490. friends and family who get together with us
491. modern medicine
492. Sears, which has "everything"
493. nearby Menard's
494. music to play or listen to
495. boys who aren't too old to hug mom
496. Lipton green tea
497. mail! (didn't have it for two days...)
498. books that come right in the mail and I don't have to go out to find something to read
499. newspapers! (didn't get one for two days...)
500. tv station reporters who get out in the worst weather and let you know what's going on with the weather and what to avoid

Describe


I have a journal book that I've had for years called A Family Legacy for Your Children: Reflections from a Mother's Heart: Your Life Story in Your Own Words.I'm just now getting around to writing responses in it according to the prompts. I'm having a hard time.


James Thurber said in his book, My Life and Hard Times (my favorite book, by the way...):
"Benevenuto Cellini said that a man should be at least forty years old before he undertakes so fine an enterprise as that of setting down the story of his life. He said also that an autobiographer should have accomplished something of excellence. Nowadays nobody who has a typewriter pays any attention to the old master's quaint rules."
This makes me laugh. What would James Thurber think of blogdom? (I think he'd definitely be in the thick of the blog world. He died in 1961, though.)

Well, I have not accomplished much of "excellence" according to the world at large, but I do qualify according Cellini's age requirements. So, I have been inclined lately to write down some thoughts in that "legacy" journal for my boys. Did I say that I'm having a hard time? I really fit more into James Thurber's book and memories--and could probably find more prompts there to instigate my memories.

I was particularly struggling over this one: "Describe your mother in her best dress."

Yes, my mother had a lot of dresses at various points in her life, so no problem there. Before the fabulous late '60s/early '70s, that's probably all she wore were dresses--even at home. Every photo I have of her in black and white, she is wearing a dress. But I don't remember her dresses. I have a hard time even thinking of her in dress in my memories of life with her. She wore shorts, pedal pushers, slacks--she was always sporty and tall and thin. I couldn't remember. I stared at that page for a long time. It upset me that I couldn't remember her in dresses because I know she wore them for special occasions and church. And she was very conscious of her appearance, though she wore minimal make up and jewelry, she always looked "movie star"ish. She had an Audrey Hepburn flair, but looked more like Kim Novak. (Ok, you people are going to say, "Who?" ha)

Then, I found this photo. I remember her agonizing over choosing this dress. Shopping with her sister for hours. It was the mother of the groom dress for my brother's first marriage. The marriage didn't last, but I remembered the dress--I have this dress in my special trunk where I keep my own wedding dress, my "going away" dress and various keepsakes of that sort. I have this dress. I couldn't part with it because I thought she never looked more beautiful to me as she did in this dress. Maybe I was emotionally sentimental at the time. There were lots of issues going on that time and I was very, very big with my pregnancy of our second son.

If anyone would pull this dress out of my trunk at my death, they wouldn't have a clue as to why I have it. So, maybe I'll put this blog with it.

However,the last dress I ever bought for my mother is the one I remember emotionally with great detail.

Mom died on a Saturday in her chair. She was on home oxygen, her heart had moved to the center and slightly to the other side of her chest because she didn't have a lung on that side anymore, so her health was deteriorating. She had already lived well past what doctors had predicted. She had ordered a navy blue and white dress because she had determined that she was going to go to church with me, my family and her husband--my father--the next day. It hung in a back spare bedroom on the door. She had a long, pleasant conversation on the phone with my uncle, her youngest brother, and then quietly slipped away into Jesus's arms, sitting in her chair. She never wore the navy and white dress. I can't remember what she was wearing in that chair. Some sort of nondescript house coat. It was her "Sabbath," as she always believed in worshipping God on Saturday.

I just couldn't bury her in that dress, because in my mind I had a certain look I wanted to accomplish for her final appearance in this earthly, broken body. So, I went shopping. My sister-in-law, Melba (my husband's sister who has gone with me on many of these kinds of journeys) went with me. She didn't say much, just mostly held my hand. The best kind of person to have in times like this.

I bought mom a pink dress with a beautiful brocade jacket with burgundies and pinks and gold and silver blue roses in it. It went beautifully with her white satin-lined casket with the pink roses embroidered in the lid. It was pink.

My aunt asked me what I had gotten mom to bury her in when I returned from dropping the items off at the funeral home. This is quite important in my family. When I told her, she said, "Oh, what'd you do that for? Her favorite color was blue!" and I nearly broke down into tears at her harsh, critical comment, but I'm one of those people who is stubborn and stoic. I just said, "Because she'll look beautiful in it."

I had no idea how she would look in it. When I had last seen my mother, she looked ill and pasty white and was sitting up in her chair, not there anymore. The warmth of her essence gone and my image of her into another etheral dimension. She was dead. I stroked her hands and her hair of her dead body. It just wasn't her. She had certainly changed from the tall, very good-looking and kind-hearted humorous mother I always knew. But she looked so peaceful. A final expression on her face that was her. So, my thought was she looked fabulous in pink, so I would bury her in pink.

Just so I do not leave you with a horrible last thought of my aunt (my dad's sister,) you have to understand that my aunt was grieving, and she had been friends with my mother longer than I had been on earth. She had her own memories of dresses and my mom's appearance. In the funeral home when just the family went into the casket room prior to opening up the viewing to the public, my aunt put her arm around me and leaned into me and said, "She looks beautiful. The pink was a good choice."

There is always a story to go along with simple exercises like these. Describe your mother in her best dress. If you have 10 siblings, I bet you'd get 10 different responses to this question because every person has their own memories, own image of someone dear to them in their mind. I can't even imagine what my boys would say about my appearance if they had to answer this question. (I'm a little worried, as a matter of fact, of what they would say!)

So, I am not sure what my response is to this prompt. Maybe just simply, "The dress was pink."